


30 Days of KV

by President_Zebra



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: 30 Days of Killervibe Challenge, Angst, F/M, Fluff, probably tears, time jumps
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:42:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 14,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24811009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/President_Zebra/pseuds/President_Zebra
Summary: My entries for the 30 Days of Killervibe Challenge, hosted by @/killervibedaily on Tumblr!
Relationships: Cisco Ramon/Caitlin Snow
Comments: 24
Kudos: 12
Collections: Killervibedaily Events





	1. Day 1: Favorite Character

**Author's Note:**

> Hi Everyone! These are my entries for the 30 days of KV challenge. They will be posted here every time and sometimes on Tumblr! I will try to keep posting consistent but I'm taking a class right now so there might be some gaps in between entries. Enjoy!  
> -Prez. Zebra
> 
> EDIT: chapters 1-9 are angst pretty much and chapter 10 is fluff!

_They say the heart breaks every time a piece of yourself goes missing, or more specifically, someone else takes a piece of you with them._

He watched her as she made her way around the lab. Cataloging every finding, every last bit of data she could write down. He stood in the doorway, leaning against the wall, smiling to himself that she was off in her own little world. 

She felt a presence from behind her and turned to see him. Their eyes met and she ran to him, crashing into his arms. And, as always, he caught her. 

"I thought I'd lost you!" She cried, pulling away from his embrace. "Are you hurt? Is everything alright? Why did they let you go?" Caitlin asked worriedly. 

"Cait, I'm okay, everything is okay. I'm here I got you," He whispered into her hair as she cried on his shoulder. "I'm not going anywhere." He continued. Caitlin looked up at him, unconvinced.

"But he said that if we didn't, he said you were..." Caitlin whimpered, unable to finish.

"Hey, shhh, don't worry about it, ok? I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere." He consoled her. She nodded and let him wrap her in his hold, unmoving and uncharted to the outside world there. 

They stilled, holding each other quietly, waiting for release. The feeling never coming as he brushed the hair out of her eyes and wiped the tears with the pad of his thumb.

"I don't know what I would've done if-"

"Hey, don't even think about it," He softly admonished. "What matters is that I'm alive, and that I'm safe, and that we're here, together." He finished, resting his forehead against hers.

"Okay, here together," Caitlin agreed. "Can we go home?" She asked quietly, almost at a whisper. He nodded slowly and began to open a breach. 

Once they were inside the apartment, Cisco helped her out of her coat and led her through the hallway, to their bedroom.

"I missed you so much, Cisco," Caitlin whispered, almost inaudibly, as she sat down on the bed. He calmly wrapped his arm around her shoulder and slowly placed a kiss to her temple.

"Me too," She collapsed against his chest and burrowed her face in the crook of his neck. He curled his arm all the way around her form and brought his other arm to her way.

"I didn't want to lose you, I couldn't have lived without waking up to you every day." She started hyperventilating.

_It might've felt like Ronnie,_ but Ronnie had come back once. 

_It might've felt like Barry,_ but she hadn't been in love with Barry.

 _It might've felt like Icicle,_ but Cisco wasn't a monster.

 _It might've felt like pain,_ but Caitlin was too numb to feel anything.

 _It might've felt like Hunter,_ but Cisco would never hurt her that much.

 _It might've felt like Killer Frost,_ but Cisco had never buried her deep inside of himself.

 _It might've felt like Nora,_ but they would see her again someday.

 _It felt like losing something, someone, the one._ It felt like losing a best friend, your favorite person. 

_It felt like losing the love of your life,_ over and over again.

"Caitlin, shh, I got you. We'll get through this," he stated softly, "Together." He finished imperceptibly. They silenced slowly in the quiet of the mid-autumn night, almost invisible to the outside world.

 _They would get through this,_ he had said.

 _Together,_ he had said.

_But what if that heart was too broken, to begin with, for it ever to be put back together?_


	2. Day 2: Favorite Episode

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A cinnamon roll, a coffee shop, a broken heart, and a lost love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dialogue used from the season 5 episode, "Blocked". Enjoy!  
> -Prez. Zebra

"Step 27: Accept that she isn't the love of your life. Because if she were, she'd still be in it." Cisco read aloud. Caitlin looked up from the cinnamon roll in front of her and glanced over at him. 

"Pretty deep for uh, Ralph Dibny." She replied as another tear trickled down her face. 

"Yeah," Cisco agreed, crumpling up the paper. "granted it took him 26 swings before he could hit the ball." that got a chuckle out of her. "I don't know, I think he might've knocked it out of the park with that one." Cisco finished, looking back up to meet her eyes. His eyes looked her face over to see any change in emotion. It was still a desolate canvas, struck with tears. 

"Gypsy isn't the one," He paused, looking up from the crumpled piece of paper. "I know that. And there's no amount of new clothes or crazy makeover distractions that can change that _fact."_ He finished. "Because some truths you can only hide from for so long. And the truth is it's too late for me to change things with her." He spoke softly, reaching for her hand. "But, it's not too late for you-" He stuttered, "it's not too late for you to change things with your dad." He completed. She looked up at him as she wiped the last few tears from her eyes.

 _But she was still in it,_ Cisco thought.

* * *

Cisco heard a knock at the door. He shut off the TV and winced at the pain in his hand. Walking toward the door, he looked through the peephole and he saw her. Saw her holding a grocery bag and the VHS tape version of The Princess Bride. He slowly unlocked and opened the door and let her in.

"Caitlin, what are you doing here?" He said in a low mumble. She didn't respond, making her way to the kitchen to get two spoons from his utensil drawer. "Cait, please it's late I don't-"

"No, I'm here to make everything better!" Caitlin piped up from across the room. Cisco put his head in his hands and made a groaning noise, which caused a playful eye-roll out of her. Cisco took the VHS tape and brought it to the player and put it in the slot. It went in slowly and he turned the television back on so he could play the movie. 

"Well, I thought you had to look over the scans of my cuts?" He asked, coming back to the counter to face her. She looked up from what she was doing and shook her head softly.

"That can wait until tomorrow." She smiled handing him a spoon and one of the pints of ice cream she brought. He gladly accepted but gave her a questioning look at her strange behavior.

"It's not like Caitlin Snow, MD to skip out on a new opportunity for scientific discovery," he teased in between spoonfuls. "But seriously, why are you here Caitlin?" He questioned, looking up at her as he reached across the space to take hold of her forearm.

"I wanted to continue what we discussed this afternoon." She admitted, twisting her hand out of his hold and coming around the counter to face him properly.

"Yeah, I already vibed the certificate, Ralph and I can continue going through it tomorrow." He answered, a puzzled look spreading on his face. She sighed, grabbing hold of his elbow and leading him to the sofa. 

"No, I meant about," they sat down and she sighed, "Gypsy, and what you said earlier." She continued, hoping that it gave the situation more clarity. He was dumbfounded, to say the least. _Hadn't we'd moved past this already?_ He thought.

"I'm over Gypsy now, you actually kind of helped me today. Ralph too, in his own little way." Cisco chuckled, putting his palm at the base of her knee. She looked down at his hand placement and then back into his eyes.

"You're not understanding, Cisco," She exclaimed, "I'm not talking about Gypsy."

"What are you talking about then?"

"Me! Cisco, I'm talking about me." He looked up at her, very confused. "You had said 'accept that she isn't the love of your life because if she were she'd still be in it.' Yes, Gypsy is gone, but-"

"You're still here." He finished for her.

"I'm still here," She repeated. He took her hands in his and brought them to his lips. "and I'm not going anywhere." She finished. He smiled and nodded.

"We don't have to dance around it anymore," He stated. "for the first time in years we're both available and we're both-"

"Ready," she smiled. Leaning forward, she brought her lips to meet his and he removed his hands from hers and ran them into her hair. 

A smile spread across his features as the kiss deepened, an identical look creeping onto her's as well.

They didn't have to just be 'Caitlin & Cisco: BFFS and Partners in Crime' anymore, they could be 'Caitlin & Cisco: Loves of Each Other's Lives'.

 _She was still here,_ he thought.

_And she wasn't going anywhere._


	3. Day 3: Favorite Season

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cold hands; unable to reach out to him. Unable to tell him the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok, so some of this is kind of confusing if you don't read this note. After the first time jump, Caitlin and Cisco are together. Enjoy!  
> -Prez. Zebra

Caitlin zipped up her jacket and put her hands into her pockets, making her way inside the coffee shop. The woman in front of her held the door open and Caitlin thanked her softly before getting in line to get her coffee. Then she saw him.

He was sitting in one of the lounge chairs, in the far back corner of the room. His fingers were swiping over a tablet as he sipped his drink. Caitlin ran her hand through her hair and then put on her winter hat, ducking her head behind the woman in front of her to try to get out of herself out of his line of sight. Caitlin tucked the one strand of white hair back behind her ear as the line moved forward.

"Caitlin! Whatcha doing here?" Cisco tapped her shoulder. She turned around to face him, losing her spot in line.

"I'm just getting coffee, Cisco," Caitlin said walking to the back of the line. Cisco stepped in beside her, trying to read her expression. He caught a slight glimpse of something light and conflicting with her soft chestnut hair. He reached up to her ear and pulled out the lock of hair.

"It's happening quicker than we thought?" He asked. Looking around to see if anyone was listening she nodded and took his hand. Leading him through the back door and into the back alley, Caitlin took off her beanie and let her hair flow out all at once. Cisco looked at here in desperation, yearning for answers "What happened?"

"I, I took off the cuffs." She stammered out. He looked into her eyes, now that he thought about it, they had a slight crystalline effect to them. A frozen tear trickled down her cheek. Cisco reached up to wipe it away but Caitlin stopped him. "Cisco, please don't tell the team. Ever since Iris got hurt, and I almost lost control _again,_ I, just, I'll tell them when I'm ready." She pleaded, he nodded and put his arms around her form and brought her in close.

She was cooler than the last time he'd hugged her. Not an icicle but not a furnace either, an icy medium perhaps. She reciprocated his embrace.

"C'mon, let's go _home,"_ he whispered as he opened a breach back to the cortex.

* * *

_1 month later_

"Come on you got this, one more time!" Cisco said with encouragement. Caitlin looked over her shoulder and smiled at him before shooting the icy mist out of her palms at the training dummy. The rubber blasted across the room and crashed into the far back wall. Cisco ran to her and enveloped her in his arms.

"That's my girl!" He cheered lifting up his hand for a high-five. Caitlin returned it and smiled. She looked down at her attire, Cisco had made it for her. It was only a prototype but it would do for training. It was navy blue leather pants and combat boots paired with a Navy tank with a snowflake emblem in the middle. Her eyes were still blue, but she was working on getting the transition down.

"Ice cream?" She asked, her hair fading back to brown as she snaked her arm through the crook in his elbow. He looked over at her and smiled

"Anything for you," He replied as they walked out of the speed lab to the elevator.

* * *

_2 weeks later_

"No more strawberry," Cisco admitted, walking closer to the gurney to hand her the lime JELL-O.

"What do you mean there's no more strawberry?" Caitlin looked dumbfounded. "I just bought some like, a week ago." 

"Yeah well," He sat down on the edge of the bed, "I may have eaten some slash all,"

"Cisco!" Caitlin's mouth fell open,

"Do you want me to go out and get you more strawberry JELL-O? I will get you more." He rolled his eyes with the spoon still in his mouth.

"No, it's fine," She shrugged, "But next time I operate on you, you're getting bub kiss, mister." She teased

"You really scared me today, Caitlin." He turned toward her. "I thought I was going to lose you, _again._ "

"C' mere," she said, scooting over on the bed to make room for him. He got in next to her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I can't, I _won't,_ lose you, Caitlin." She nodded and he kissed her hair as she slowly fell asleep, him knowing that she was safe in his arms.

* * *

_Savitar, 1 week later_

Killer Frost had faced Barry Allen before, but this time he was a monster. This time he was _Savitar._ Barry Allen had changed when Iris West had died, but this time he was too far gone.

 _He had proved that_ when he had come to STAR labs and betrayed them.

 _He had proved that_ when he had killed Iris West, _HR Wells,_ without any remorse.

 _He had proved that_ when he had backup plans for his backup plans just so he could rule the world.

 _He had proved that_ when he had threatened to murder his _Best Friend's_ best friend.

 _He had proved that_ when he had said he had loved them, when he had said that they would always be his family.

Killer Frost had faced Cisco Ramon before, but Cisco still believed in her. 

Killer Frost wasn't _Killer Frost,_ she was Frost.

Was Frost worried that the same thing would happen to him if she had succumbed to Iris West's fate? _Only if he were a coward._

 _Barry Allen wasn't a Coward,_ Savitar was.

 _Cisco Ramon wasn't a Coward,_ Reverb was.

 _Ronnie Raymond wasn't a Coward,_ Deathstorm was.

_Caitlin Snow wasn't a Coward..._

_Or was she?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Caitlin was in the gurney because of Abra Kadabra, but after they got the shrapnel out, she used killer frost's accelerated healing to "stitch-up" the wound. And also, so the writers never explained how the powers were making her turn evil so I thought I could just work around that and have her be good. This was more of a favorite season rewrite, but whatever. Oh and Cisco and Cynthia don't get together.  
> -Prez. Zebra


	4. Day 5: Favorite Parallel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I decided to skip day 4 for now because I couldn't pick a storyline, so here is an edit I made for Day 5. Enjoy!

[Day 5: Favorite Parallel](https://president-zebra.tumblr.com/post/621772585822289920/day-5-favorite-parallel)

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/535147420904980482/725071530995744828/Screen_Shot_2020-06-23_at_3.34.58_PM.png)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for viewing!


	5. Day 4: Favorite Storyline

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "As cold as ice."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last Fanart for a while, expect some more fics in the next few days. :)  
> -PZ

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/535147420904980482/726099164525494362/Screen_Shot_2020-06-26_at_11.36.30_AM.png)

[Also on Tumblr](https://president-zebra.tumblr.com/post/622000463482667008/day-4-favorite-storyline)

Enjoy! 


	6. Day 6: Favorite Cisco Wardrobe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to @/ava-has-a-closet-murderboard on Tumblr for helping with this.  
> -PZ

_Caitlin Snow wasn't jealous._

_Caitlin Snow had an amazing best friend in Cisco Ramon_

_Caitlin Snow had everything figured out._

_Or did she?_

* * *

Cisco looked in the mirror of the STAR labs locker room. It used to be where he and the other engineers would change to go down and check on the construction of the particle accelerator. 

He held the curling iron up to a strand of hair and wrapped it around the barrel. She came in quietly, but he could still sense her footsteps. She stopped slowly, putting her hand on his shoulder and smiling at him through the mirror.

“You look nice,” She complimented him. He chuckled slightly, putting the finishing touches on the final curl. “Gypsy will definitely love it.” She continued, smile wavering slightly, it becoming forced as she said the words.

“So, got any plans for the evening?” He asked, unplugging the curling iron and resting it on the bench. She came around to face him directly, her hands making their way up his chest to fix his tie. She didn’t answer, tightening the bow slightly as he sucked in a breath. “Caitlin?”

“Hmm?” She looked back up at him. She started to peel her hand away but he caught it and held it there. 

“Well I have a date, the Wests are having family game night, what are _you_ doing, Dr. Snow?” He smiled, releasing her hand as she smoothed out the bottom of her romper. She sat down on the bench, resting her hands on her knees as she looked up at him.

“Nothing, um I was actually thinking of calling it a night.” She played with a thread on the bottom of the romper. He smiled, reaching for her chin and lifting it to meet his gaze.

“Now, that’s no fun, is it. Why don’t you ask Barry or Iris to join them for game night?” 

“It’s not the right time. I still don’t feel like I have the right to be back here right now, let alone in the West house.” She clarified as he nodded, frowning solemnly at her answer. 

She had finally come back to him. She had finally come home, but she didn’t feel she as though she was wanted.

“No one wants me here, not yet at least.” She told him, averting her gaze. He sat down next to her on the bench and clasped his palm on her knee.

“What makes you think that? Because you went all Frozone on us? Because you worked with Savitar? Because those things have been forgiven.” Caitlin shifted her gaze to the rose that was resting on top of his sport coat. She reached over and picked it up, taking in its essence. 

Cisco, every now and then, called her a rose, she was often guarded and cold, like a thorn, but soft and bubbly like a rose petal. 

“But what if I-” She stuttered, placing the rose on her lap, “what if I become _her,_ again?” 

“That’s not going to happen, and if for some reason it does.” He paused, reaching for her hand, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. “We- _I_ will be here every step of the way to help you, ok?” She nodded, almost on the brink of tears. He cleared her cheeks with the pad of his thumb. 

“Now, how about you finish helping me get ready, and then we can go set up the table, ok?” He added playfully. She nodded, wiping the remaining tears and smoothing out the romper as she stood up. 

She picked up his sport coat from off the bench and offered to help him into it. He stood up, taking the help gratefully and put his arms through each sleeve, buttoning it up down the middle. Caitlin came around and smoothed out his lapels. 

“You look very handsome,” She said, brushing some lint off of his right shoulder. “She’s going to love it.” She finished. He smiled wholeheartedly, playfully swatting her hand away from his shoulder. 

Caitlin had never seen him like this before. A three-piece suit, a slight foundation she could tell he had applied. Gypsy must have really been the _one_. Caitlin frowned to herself as Cisco put on the last touches in the mirror.

“Where did you get this suit anyway?” She asked curiously, walking closer to him. He felt her breath on the back of his neck, turning around before she could get _too_ close. 

“My cousin Hector owns a tuxedo shop down on 5th. Family discount.” He answered. She nodded, handing him the rose. She grabbed hold of his shoulder, turning him back toward the mirror.

“Well I like it, it’s made well.” She nodded, agreeing with herself. She put her hands on his shoulders, staring at him through the mirror. 

“And you would know this, how? I didn’t know Caitlin Snow, _MD,_ knew so much about tailoring.” He teased as she scoffed. “C’mon, let’s go set up.” He told her, offering her his arm. She looped hers through the crook in his elbow and made their way through the speed lab. 

* * *

Cisco laid the table setting down and smoothed out the table cloth one last time. Pleased with himself, he turned his attention to his friend.

Caitlin was sitting in the entrance to the track, admiring him from afar. Admiring how he looked in a tuxedo. Admiring how focused he was on making the table setting perfect. Admiring how defined his heroic physique shined in the candlelight.

“Caitlin,” Cisco waved a hand in front of her face, pulling her back to reality.

“Hmm?” She looked up at him. Studying his face, she noticed a slight streak of red, a small blush spreading on her face as well. 

“Gypsy is gonna be here soon, it’s time for you to go home.” He said holding his hands out to help her stand up. She accepted and nodded, giving him a pat on the back as he opened a breach for her to her apartment.

She landed in her kitchen and went straight to her bedroom. Kicking off her boots and changing into a camisole and sleeping shorts, she flicked on her TV and surfed through the channels for something she wanted to watch.

Caitlin couldn’t stop thinking about _him._

_Him in that suit._

_Him in that hair._

_Him in the mirror._

Caitlin looked down and felt the place right below her stomach growing damp.

 _You’re in love with him._ Killer Frost said in a raspy, disembodied voice in her head. 

“Maybe.”

* * *

_Caitlin Snow was jealous._

_Caitlin Snow was falling in love with Cisco Ramon._

_And she was falling hard._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I loved this suit and it was really underrated outfit!


	7. Day 7: Favorite Caitlin Wardrobe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I really love her suit, and it's her first real suit which he made for her. It's mainly fluff but there's some angst at the beginning. It's kinda hurt/comfort. Enjoy!  
> -PZ

She was clutching her side in agony, blood dripping from right below her rib, the black of her Frost suit growing redder by the second. 

Cisco ran into the med bay, slowly helping her onto the gurney as her hair faded back to brown, He laid her down, resting her head against the pillow. He rushed to the cabinet and got forceps and an antiseptic wipe, setting up a tray on a cart next to the bed. 

He took out a pair of surgical scissors and cut open the material of the suit directly above the wound. Cringing at his work being destroyed but knowing he was saving her life, he continued cutting open the suit. He applied pressure to the wound with the pressure bandage, trying to stunt the bleeding before it got worse.

“Cisco, please It hurts,” Caitlin whimpered, squirming away from his touch. 

“Hey, I know but you have to let me treat it or it’s going to get a lot worse.” Cisco pleaded, pressing harder as the bleeding continued. 

Barry sped into the med bay with more medical supplies, putting them on the bottom of the cart and taking over for Cisco at the pressure bandage. Caitlin winced, shifting slightly on the bed, making Barry’s job more difficult. 

Cisco came around the other side and brought the forceps to hover slightly above the laceration. He counted to three before putting the forceps inside the wound as Barry held up a flashlight so Cisco could see what he was doing. He finally found the piece of shrapnel, carefully extracting the light bullet from her abdomen. 

He sighed in relief when the extraction was a success, putting the bloody forceps on the tray and laying a cold, damp washcloth on her forehead. 

“Ok Cait, that’s it, it’s over,” He said, kneeling beside where her head was resting on the pillow, “You did so well.” He praised her, reaching to put his palm on her forearm.

“I did, didn’t I?” She chuckled slightly, before wincing and realizing that laughing was a mistake. 

He nodded and smiled down at her. “You can let Frost come back out now, and heal it the rest of the way, ok?” He urged, standing back up to look at her fully. She nodded with a smile as her eyes began to close and her hair began to fade silver.

“Rest Cait,” He smiled, sitting down on the chair next to her bed. Barry got the hint and walked out of the room looking for his wife, closing the door behind him.

* * *

Cisco felt a rustling of a person from beside him, looking up from _A Game of Thrones_ on his Kindle. He took off his glasses, placing them on the cart beside him. She stirred slightly, eyes fluttering open and then shutting tightly at the burst of light coming from the ceiling. 

“Welcome back to the land of the living,” He said quietly, nudging her side to get her attention. She chuckled and turned her head to look at him, noticing he hadn’t changed. She looked up at the wall clock, squinting to get a better visual, then looking back at him.

“Were you here the whole time?” She asked confused as he nodded. She started getting up slowly, wincing when she put pressure on the wound.

“Hey, lie back down, we don’t need you to get even more injured.” He told her, helping her lie back against the pillows. “You ruined my suit.” He chuckled, pointed half-assedly at her abdomen. 

“Since when is it _your_ suit?” She asked sarcastically. He snickered lightly, bringing his eyes up to meet hers.

“Since I’m the one who made it.” He answered, giving her a pointed look. She huffed at his logic, shaking her head slowly. 

“Well in that case then, Ralph’s suit is yours too, and I doubt you want to claim _that_ as your own.” She rebutted, looking back at him with a playful grin on her face. 

“Well, I didn’t put any effort into that one.” He claimed, looking over the suit. Caitlin looked down at herself, wiggling her toes, now realizing that he had removed her boots. 

The suit had been an incredible gift from an incredible friend. She didn’t know how it fit her so well, considering she didn’t just give out her measurements every chance she got. Frost had said that she felt like herself in the suit, _that’s probably what Cisco was going for._ Caitlin thought.

“I am very proud of your’s and I’m glad I got to make you one, your last one was pretty lame.” She scrunched up her nose and stuck her tongue out at him.

“Hey! It was not lame, it was just _different._ ” Caitlin responded, rolling her eyes at his antics. 

“ _Different,_ sure.” Cisco chuckled, standing up to sit on the edge of her bed. 

“I just wanted to say goodbye, before I go off on my ‘Grand Aventure Across Earth Prime’.” He said in a tone of voice that sounded like the monitor, moving his hand across the space in a grand gesture. Caitlin giggled before glaring at him. “No, not a good name? Yeah, I didn’t think so, I’m working on it.” Cisco admitted, before turning his attention back to his friend. 

“You’ve gotten rusty,” She said with a shrug, him acting playfully hurt by putting a hand on his heart in anguish. 

“I’m wounded,” He jokingly collapsed against the end of the bed. She giggled, Frost’s healing already had completed its miracle work. She sat upright, resting her back against the pillows. 

Pulling her legs back up into a criss-cross position to make for him to sit properly. He swiveled his body to face, reaching to take her hand in his. 

“I’ll fix it before you leave, ok?” She nodded gratefully, knowing all to well that she may have to go back in the field sooner than she should. He dropped his hand onto her calf, rubbing circular patterns into the material of her suit as she watched him fondly. “I really love that suit, you look really good in it.” He said casually, which caused her to look up at him.

“Thank you?” She asked, confused. He smiled, shaking his head slowly. 

“It’s a compliment, Caitlin. And of course, you do, I made your suit after all.” He replied. She smirked, and he realized his mistake.

“So it _is_ my suit?” She started giggling, hitting him lightly on the shoulder. He nodded in defeat, noticing the effect she had on him, something he was quickly realizing _someone else_ didn’t. 

“Yes, it’s your suit, Cait. You win.” He held up his hands in mock surrender. He swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood up, walking over to one of the tables to pick up the STAR labs sweater and leggings Barry had set out for her. She took them, thanking him as he left the room, allowing her to change. He sighed to himself on his way out, _this was gonna be a long trip._

* * *

_The suit had been magnificent._

_She had looked absolutely breathtaking._

_He knew it wasn’t the right time._

_He knew he was still with someone else._

_He knew she wasn’t ready._

_He knew it was only in his imagination._

_Or was it?_


	8. Day 8: Favorite Cisco Quote to Caitlin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lot's of dialogue used from various episodes. As well as lyrics from the song, How to save a life by The Fray.  
> -PZ

_“I think about, all of the memories I cherish most. And you’re in every single one of them, Caitlin.”_

* * *

Cisco walks slowly through the frozen coniferous forest, being careful with every footstep, every crackling leave, every snapped twig. 

He knows she can hear him, he knows she’s getting closer. He knows that if he doesn’t get through to her now, it’ll all be over. 

He stops looking up at the falling snow, looking out to find her.

“I know you’re here,” Cisco yells, “Come out and face me like a woman.” Cisco finishes.

Killer Frost appears before him, a smug look on her face.

“I didn’t think you’d actually show.” Killer Frost replies in a cold, raspy voice. Cisco cringes, gruffing at the distinct difference between his best friend and _her._

“That’s ‘cause you don’t know anything about me,” Cisco spits out, “or _Caitlin,_ for that matter.” 

* * *

_Step one, you say we need to talk_

_He walks, you say sit down, it's just a talk  
_

_He smiles politely back at you  
_

_You stare politely right on through_

_January 2013_

_“I’m Dr. Caitlin Snow, it’s very nice to meet you,” Caitlin says with a smile, holding out her hand for the other man to take._

_“Cisco Ramon, nice to meet you,” Cisco returns the gesture, firmly shaking the woman’s hand._

_“And just ignore Hartley, we all do.” She says jokingly, smiling in Hartley’s direction._

_“Tell your_ boyfriend _I need his specs on the synchrotron by end of day.” Hartley tells her condescendingly. Caitlin shakes her head proudly._

_“Actually, it is the end of Ronnie’s day. We are leaving early,” Caitlin corrects him, “my boyfriend is taking me out of town for our one year anniversary.” Caitlin says proudly, beginning to make her leave._

_“Aw, that’s sweet.” Cisco smiles at her._

_“Thanks, I’ll see you guys on Monday.”_

_“See ya, “ Cisco says as he watches her leave the cortex. “She seems nice,” Cisco says, turning back to face Hartley. “You don’t.”_

_“I give you a week,” Hartley estimates, “Max.” He completes, heading through the door to the medical bay._

_“What a dick,” Cisco mutters under his breath._

_“Yeah, Hartley’s an acquired taste, but you get used to him.” A man in a white lab coat says behind Cisco. He turns around to face him. “I’m Alex,” The man says, putting his clipboard under his arm and reaching forward for Cisco’s hand._

_“Cisco,” He says shaking the other man’s hand. “So what do you do?” Cisco asks curiously, noticing the lab coat._

_“Oh, I’m just a lab tech, nothing big. I help Dr. Snow.” Alex tells him nonchalantly, jotting something down on his clipboard._

_“That must be so cool, she seems really nice,” Cisco responds, smiling at him._

_“She has her moments, enjoy the rest of your day.” Alex completes, walking back into one of the many wings of the cortex. Cisco stares at the empty space the man leaves, confused by what he means. Cisco brushes it off as nothing, walking around the different spaces, getting a feel for his new job._

_Caitlin returns on Monday with a ring on her left hand. The whole building congratulates her every chance they get. Dr. Wells hosts a mini celebration in the cafeteria during lunches. Ronnie wraps his arm around Caitlin’s waist as other scientists gather around to see Caitlin’s finger._

_Cisco stays back, leaning against the door frame to the entrance of the cafeteria. His hair is coming out of its bun, his shirt beginning to stick to his chest. Cisco button’s up his sport coat one more button and covers the rest of his star trek T-Shirt with the jacket._

_“You should be happy for her,” A familiar voice says behind him. Cisco turns to see Alex standing in the hallway, his labcoat tied around his waist, and his sweater vest as baggy as it had been the last time Cisco had seen him._

_“I am happy for her, what are you talking about?” Cisco asks him, crossing his arms over his chest. Alex scoffs pointing weakly at the couple in the other room. Cisco follows his finger to see Caitlin laughing at one of Ronnie’s jokes, other white coats surround them._

_“I saw how you looked at her on Friday, I know what that feels like,” Alex tells him, looking beyond Caitlin and Ronnie to a glasses and sweater-wearing engineer sitting to the left of Dr. Wells. Cisco looks at Hartley and then back to Alex, mouth hanging open._

_“It doesn’t matter, I barely know her, and she seems happy.” Cisco rebuts, coming off of the wall and moving deeper into the hallway. Alex nods, taking off his glasses and rubbing the bridge of his nose._

_“Just be careful alright, “ Alex warns, “She’s been hurt before.” He completes, walking past Cisco into the cafeteria. Cisco’s jaw is still ajar, watching as Alex walks over to Caitlin and gives her a hug, shaking Ronnie’s hand._

_Cisco couldn’t do that to her, he shouldn’t do that to her. He barely knew her._

* * *

_March 2013_

_Cisco tinkers with the dubnium capacitor, tweaking different sections. He hears a slight knock on the entrance to the lab. Caitlin appears in the doorway wearing her lab coat and a blue dress. Cisco looks up at her, smiling at his friend. Caitlin pulls out one of the stools from underneath his workstation and sits down next to her._

_“Hi, Caitlin, how was your weekend?” Cisco asks genuinely, not looking up from his work. Caitlin doesn’t respond, watching him snip the red wire of the circuitry weave, curiously waiting for him to make a discovery. “Caitlin, are you alright?” He asks concerned, Caitlin smiles playfully, resting her palm on his shoulder._

_“My weekend was fine Cisco, how was yours?” She finally responds, swiveling on the stool so that she’s facing him. He puts down his screwdriver, taking off his goggles and looking in her direction. He notices her smile, he hasn’t seen her smile like that since January._

_“Did something special happen this weekend?” Cisco asks, wiggling his eyebrows at her. She scoffs berating him on how they’re in a place of work. He chuckles, putting his goggles back on as he listens to her tell him about Ronnie’s parents and how much fun they had in Ivy Town that past weekend._

_Caitlin keeps going, discussing how Ronnie’s father was a Firefighter and his mom is a school teacher. She goes on to talk about his dog, Scout, and Ronnie’s little sister Joey. Cisco listens closely, eating up every minute he gets to spend with her, even if it was at work and about Ronnie’s family._

_Cisco screws on one more thing and then sets down his tools and takes off his goggle for the rest of the day. Caitlin has just finished, telling him how Mrs. Raymond showed her Ronnie’s old rock collection from when he was a kid. Cisco chuckles lightly, reminding himself to tell Ronnie that the next time he see’s him. Caitlin finishes her story, smiling wholeheartedly as Cisco smiles back at her._

_Caitlin asks him if he wants to go get lunch with her and Ronnie. He declines the first time, saying he has to finish the capacitor or Hartley will be on him the rest of the day._

_The next time he wants to say yes, but he sees Alex out of the corner of his eye, shaking his head. Cisco declines, making up an excuse about him having to help Hartley out with his project._

_One day in April, Ronnie knocks on the door of his workstation, holding up a bag of piping hot Big Belly Burger. Ronnie sits next to Cisco, handing him a paper-wrapped burger and a box of fries. Cisco clears away his project, so as to not get crumbs on it. Ronnie asks Cisco questions, starting to get to know him, asking him if he wants to go to lunch with them tomorrow._

_This time, Cisco says yes, it’s a weary yes, but a yes none the less. Alex sees him leaving the building around 12:30 the next day, shaking his head at him as he follows Ronnie and Caitlin to the elevator._

_From then on, Cisco, Ronnie, and Caitlin get lunch together often, working around each other’s schedules to find the perfect date._

_Spring comes and goes, and it’s eventually summer. Caitlin starts wearing flowier dresses and starts wearing professional sandals instead of her usual pumps. Cisco notices, smiling fondly from across the cortex when Dr. Wells holds his briefing._

_Hartley gets fired in August, only a few months until the particle accelerator. No one knows why, no one questions Dr. Wells' motives, no one knows the truth._

_Dr. Wells transfers Alex to the Starling City branch in September. Cisco hugs him before he leaves, taking him to the train station to see him off._

_Summer turns to Autumn, and Ronnie asks Cisco to be his best man. Cisco is unsure, trying not to let his feelings blind him, but knows that she’s happy._

_Cisco accepts and Caitlin couldn’t be more than happy. Cisco’s happy for her, he really is. Or is he?_

* * *

_December 11, 2013_

_“Dr. Wells,” Cisco states, shutting off the monitor as the older man makes his way into the cortex. “We just got the latest weather report, uh, a big thunderstorm is rolling in,” Cisco tells Dr. Wells, waiting for his reaction._

_Dr. Wells brushes it off, “Well, we’re not launching a space shuttle, we’ll be fine,” He says, not swaying his attention from the television in front of him._

_Cisco nods and smiles, making his way back around the center console._

_Ronnie and Caitlin come out of the side wing as Dr. Wells gathers everyone in the room around the main desk._

_Cisco’s smile wavers as Ronnie puts an arm around her waist. Caitlin brushes pizza crumbs off of her dress, waving slightly at Cisco as Dr. Wells begins his speech._

_Then everything changes._

_Ronnie kisses Caitlin one last time and follows Cisco down to the pipeline._

_Ronnie opens the door to the Particle Accelerator ring, Cisco stops behind him._

_“Okay, you stay here. We only got a few minutes before this thing blows, and if I’m not back in time you need to initiate lockdown.”_

_“No way, I am not closing this door. I won’t be able to open it again,” Cisco refutes._

_“Cisco, If you don’t seal off the blast, everyone in this building will die,” Ronnie pleads, stuttering on the last few words. “Including_ Caitlin.” 

_Ronnie tells him to set his watch for two minutes, Cisco knows he won’t make it back, but he listens anyway, clicking buttons on his wrist as Ronnie runs into the accelerator._

_The watch beeps and Cisco closes the door as Caitlin arrives at the entrance to the pipeline._

_“Cisco where’s Ronnies?” Caitlin asks through half-shed tears. “Cisco, where is her?” She cries, looking from him to the door and back._

_“He’s still inside,”_

_“What? Open the door!”_

_“I can’t, we’re in lockdown mode.”_

_“We have to get him out of there, or he’ll die!” She stammers. Ronnies voice sounds through the radio. “Ronnie it’s me, “_

_“Caitlin,” Ronnie says through his cries, a loud bang sounds from inside the ring. “Is Cisco there?”_

_“Ya, Ronnie I’m here, I’m listening.” Ronnie gives him instructions on how to make the blast goes up. “I’ll have to reset the particle parameters to compensate,” Cisco tells him, giving the radio back to Caitlin._

_“Cisco’s doing it, “ Caitlin tells her fiance, walking closer to the barrier. “There has to be another way out of there, you have to find it.” Caitlin’s voice cracks as she clutches the device closer to herself._ _“Cait,” He says through the radio, “The chain reaction, I can’t reverse it. The doors need to stay shut to protect you.” Ronnie stutters out as he moves out of the way of falling debris. “You still there?”_

_“I’m here,” she whispers._

_“Caitlin, whatever happens,”_

_“Ronnie,”_

_“RONNIE!”_

* * *

_Some sort of window to your right_

_As he goes left, and you stay right_

_Between the lines of fear and blame  
_

_You begin to wonder why you came_

_May 2016_

_Caitlin stares into the glass of the windowpane. She sees him, she sees Zoom. She flinches, turning around to face the monster._

_“No, no!” She shutters, backing up into the desk._

_“Hey,” Cisco comes forward. “Hey, hey, hey, hey, it’s me, ok?” He tells her, putting both hands on her shoulders. “Breath, breath. You’re ok, right? You’re shaking.” He soothes her._

_“I, I thought I saw him, Zoom,” She stutters, “I thought I saw him right there.” She looks into the empty space in front of her._

_“It’s just me.” He reassures her, “Okay, look at me, he’s not here.” He tells her. “He’s not here.”_

**_I am, I always will be._ ** _Cisco thinks to himself._

* * *

_November 2016_

_“I took your cuffs,” Caitlin says, coming into his workshop as she takes them off._

_He looks up from his workstation as she places them on the desk. “Why?”_

_“Because I need them.”_

_“Is this, is this some sort of, um, bold fashion choice?” He asks sarcastically, “Because the truth is, you’re not a metahum-” the words die on his tongue as he watches her freeze the glass of water._

_“Surprise,” She says coldly, flipping over the glass to show him. He takes the glass out of her hands to examine it. “It started a few months ago,” She admits, her eyes growing slightly shiny._

_“So you went to see your mom, so she could help you.” Cisco realizes. Caitlin explains how her mother couldn’t do anything._

_She asks him to vibe her._

_He takes hold of her palm, watching as one of his vibe blasts destroys one of her icicles._

_“I didn’t see anything,” He lies, “You’re fine.”_

_She isn’t fine._

* * *

_April 2017_

_Caitlin Snow isn’t breathing._

_“HR, grab the crash cart!” Julian yells, starting compressions on her chest. "Cisco grab the oxygen.”_

_Cisco obliges pressing the device over her mouth, brushing hair out of his face. HR charges the paddles under Julian’s advice._

_“You’re good,” HR tells Julian as he hands him the paddles._

_Julian presses them against her chest. Nothing happens. They charge them again, higher this time. Nothing happens._

_The heart rate monitor goes flat, all Cisco can hear is the machine._

_Julian rips off her necklace._

_“That’s not what she wanted!” Cisco shouts in the past tense. The three men are waiting for a sign of life._

_The monitor beeps, the wound starts to heal._

_A cold, misty breath escapes Caitlin’s mouth._

_Her eyes turn blue and she explodes in a cloud of white._

* * *

_May 2017_

_Killer Frost stands at the work station in the medical bay as Cisco recants a memory to Julian._

_“Take Charge!” She completes, not turning to face him. Cisco smiles, telling her she’s right. He looks up at Julian and then down at his lap._

_“I think about, all of the memories I cherish most. And you’re in every single one of them, Caitlin.”_

_Killer Frost grimaces, walking to the opposite side of the room._

_“Let’s figure this out, I don’t want to be here any longer than I have to.”_

_“Suit yourself.”_

* * *

_Now_

“Savitar’s right,” Killer Frost stammers, “In order to join him as a god, I have to cure myself of Caitlin.” 

Cisco cringes, not making a move forward.

“This has to happen!”

“I don’t want to fight you,” He tells her.

“I don’t want to fight you either,” Killer Frost admits, “‘I want to kill you.” 

She throws an icicle.

He shoots a vibe blast.

The two collide, the icicle breaking on impact.

Cisco isn’t paying attention to Killer Frost for her to blast him into the snow. Caught off-guard, he doesn’t get the chance to stand back up, for her to corner him.

“Bye-bye, vibe. “ She smirks, holding her hands up ready to kill him when she hears a woosh behind her. 

Savitar arrives, tells her not to kill him. She’s reluctant, but obliges, knowing it’s what’s best for the current course of action.

Cisco knows that she's in there somewhere. 

He knows that _his_ Caitlin is not dead.

* * *

_Where did I go wrong?  
_

_I lost a friend  
_

_Somewhere along in the bitterness  
_

_And I would have stayed up with you all night  
_

_Had I known how to save a life_


	9. Day 9: Favorite Caitlin Quote to Cisco

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is one of my favorite Caitlin quotes. This is kind of a part 2 to last chapter. Cisco told the point of view of the first half of their friendship, which is season pre-season 1 -season 3. And then Caitlin's point of view is season 5-6. I didn't include season 4 because I just don't really remember a lot from that season and there wasn't that much material to work with. Enjoy.  
> -PZ

_“And you’re my friend. You’re my friend who went out there and hurt himself today, just to help me try and find my dad.” Caitlin told him. “And that wasn’t Vibe. That was Cisco, and that’s the guy I need.”_

* * *

She watches as his nose bleeds from the vibe. He collapses on the floor of the abandoned warehouse. Sherloque and Ralph hover over her as she assesses his wounds. Visibly, he’s fine. Physically, he could be better, but nothing pain killers and bandages won’t fix. Emotionally, he’s broken, he’s in pain.

All she wants to do is help him.

She tells him to leave when he is wary of her father. Blinded by her love for a man she lost decades prior, unable to see the truth.

Barry tells her they love her. He tells her that she is their family, Cisco’s family.

Icicle betrays them.

Cisco puts his arm on her shoulder, tells her _“I’m going.”_ She nods following after him, and the rest of the team.

She freezes as she watches him and her team takes their final breaths. She hears him tell her _“You can do it, concentrate.”_ She stands back up and blasts her father into oblivion.

Her smile turns to a frown as Sherloque recants all of the pain Cisco has been through the past year. He spirals into a ‘NO MORE THANKSGIVING’ frenzy. She stands by him, she regards him quietly, agreeing with his findings. 

They get drunk, drinking vodka and eating pistachios. Her grey shirt catches on the bowl, balancing herself. She feels worthless, letting Frost come out to talk some sense into him, and her. 

Thanksgiving goes off without a hitch. 

The Monitor haunts him as red clouds and yellow lightning populate the skies above them. They raid Arkham Assylum with the help of their super friends. Meeting new ones along the way.

But the important part to her is that they did it together. 

He asks her to make a cure with him. She’s reluctant, unsure why he feels they need one. She eventually agrees, doing what she thinks is best for their friendship.

Because it’s only that, _a friendship._

She wishes for it to be more. She wishes for him to be more to her. She wishes to _love_ again, to _feel_ again. 

He meets a girl at a bar. Ralph tells her that the light returned to his eyes that night. 

She spends the night crying into her pillow. Frost tells her how pathetic she is in her mind, Caitlin ignores the ice in her throat.

Nora reverses time, _53 different scenarios. 52 different deaths._ None of the ending in Cicada’s. 

Cisco goes on his date with the woman from the bar. Caitlin helps him get ready, as much as she can, at least. 

King Shark goes beserk, attacking them at the waterfront. Her realizing she could lose him again. 

He takes her side when they confront Barry, scolding him on his disregard for permission. She realizes he will _always_ take her side.

Cicada dies, a new Cicada is born. Cisco almost dies, _again._

Caitlin is not ready for another loss just yet.

Sherloque reveals the truth. That night, Caitlin cries into Cisco’s shoulder, realizing they had been betrayed, _again._

Thomas dies. 

Thomas dies and Cisco is on Earth-19. She doesn’t know when he’ll be back, but she calls him anyway. He picks up on the third ring. 

_“Cait hey, what’s up?”_

_“He’s dead Cisco.” Caitlin whimpers into the phone._

_“Hey, calm down, who’s dead?”_

_“Icicle, my father. Cicada stabbed him and he-” Her breath hitches as she hears a woosh from behind her._

_Cisco steps out of the breach and into her bedroom, his hair is matted from the rain, and he’s soaking wet. But that doesn’t stop her from dropping the phone and running into his arms._

_She collapses against his chest, sobbing into him. He rubs circles on her back and whispers quiet nothings to soothe her._

_Her sobs die down to whimpers until they’re curled up against the wall, her asleep in his arms, and his eyes bloodshot from tears._

Nora kidnaps Cisco.

She’s stuck in the arctic with Ralph, he gets the wrong idea and thinks she has feelings for him. The rest of their trip is awkward but it doesn’t make up for the pang in her chest when Barry calls. 

_“She took him.”_

Caitlin takes out her extrapolator and she and Ralph land in the med bay. She runs into the cortex, looking for him. Their eyes meet and she runs to him.

_“I’m sorry I wasn’t here when-”_

Cisco shushes her, leading her to his workshop to tell her what happened.

Nora knocks on the doorway while he’s halfway through telling her.

_“I’m sorry Uncle Cisco, I just thought-”_

_“Hey, sobrinita, it’s ok, I know it wasn’t your intention.”_

Caitlin leaves them to discuss the rest and as she walks past Nora’s father,

_“I know how it feels, Caitlin.”_

_“What are you talking about, Barry?”_

_“You’re in love with him.”_

Those words ring in her ear as Cicada disintegrates into a million pieces. They check little Grace into the hospital, reaching out to her last bit of family before they head back to the labs.

They take the time sphere to 2049, beating Thawne but at the cost of their niece. Nora disappears in Barry and Iris’ arms. Caitlin can hear their sobs from across the park.

They get back to 2019, Iris wants to be alone.

The team, including Barry, respect her wishes.

Caitlin finds Cisco in the med bay. He’s twiddling his thumbs as his feet barely touch the ground.

_“What Thawne said, I don’t want that.” He begins. “I don’t want the extraordinary thing about my life to be, my powers.”_

He takes the cure, leaving her with a gift that she appreciates every day she goes out in the field. 

She respects his wishes and gives him and Kamilla some space to settle down. 

The next time she sees him is at the Wests’ barbecue, her wearing a flowy green jumpsuit, knowing it’s one of her best colors, hoping he notices. 

He makes starry eyes at Kamilla almost the entire afternoon. She watches from across the table, as he puts a spoonful of Cecile’s potato salad in between Kamilla’s lips. He wipes a bit of food from the corner of her mouth. They giggle at each other as Joe tells the story of Barry’s first day of 6th grade. 

Caitlin watches. Watches as her best friend is happy without her. 

She meets Ramsey at Jitters. She decides she will let Cisco be happy, she decides to move on and maybe help Ramsey. She asks Ramsey what he’s planning.

He shows her his findings, he asks for dark matter. She tells him no.

A black hole opens in the middle of the street and Caitlin is almost gone, _again._

When she gets back to STAR, she’s expecting Cisco to be asking her questions.

_Are you okay?_

_Are you hurt?_

_Do you need my help?_

He doesn’t do either. _Ralph,_ of all people, leads her to the med bay, checks her vitals. Theorizes with her on what could be going wrong with Frost.

Cisco is off working on the MAC and doesn’t return until Barry has to run into the next Blackhole.

Caitlin thinks Cisco doesn’t need her anymore.

So she lets Frost take the reigns.

Only coming out when she’s needed as _the doctor._

She comes out when Kamilla asks her to talk to him.

She tells him he should go on a trip, go on a Journey across the world. He obliges, coming back a month later smelling like fish and the desert of a thousand suns.

_“You’ve barely had any time for me.”_

It’s a cold day in April, Caitlin is still recovering from her injuries. Walking to Jitters from her apartment, she sees him.

_“Why didn’t you tell me?”_

_“Tell you what? I’m doing better, thanks for asking.” She says on the street corner._

_He tugs on her jacket sleeve, pulling her into the alleyway._

_“Why didn’t you tell me that you were in love with me?”_

_“How did you-”_

_“Barry told me, but I had a feeling for a while.”_

_“A feeling, huh.”_

_“How long Caitlin?”_

_“Umm. maybe-”_

_“How long?”_

_“Since my Dad.”_

_“That was over a year ago, why didn’t you say anything?”_

_“I was afraid, that I would push you away. Besides you’re with-”_

_“We broke up.”_

_“What, when?”_

_“When I got back, but she hasn’t been answering my calls recently.”_

_“Maybe you should talk to her,” Caitlin advises. He looks up at her and shakes his head._

_“We’re not finished with this, but Barry wants me back at the lab, so just, I’ll see you later.”_

Caitlin goes to the arctic with her mother, taking a private Tanhausser plane. She leans her head against the window of the plane as she watches Central City disappear from view. She sobs into the pillow of a bed at her mother's lab that night, wanting someone to hold her. Wanting _him_ to hold her. Tell her everything would be _okay._

_She didn't even get the chance to say goodbye._

* * *

_Vibe was gone._

_But Caitlin hadn’t fallen in love with Vibe._

_Cisco Ramon was the guy she wanted._

_He was the guy she needed._

_But she couldn’t have him._

_Not yet, at least._


	10. Day 10: Favorite Hug

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 5x10 hug. This is pretty much pure fluff so, enjoy!

Caitlin held her hand out for him to take. He reached out, pulling her arm lightly, leading her into his embrace. She collapsed against him, resting her head on his shoulder. She looked out and smiling, closing her eyes as he enveloped her. 

Cisco closed his eyes, basking in her embrace. Their puffy, winter coats brushed against one another as they lightly swayed to an imaginary beat. Caitlin looked up at the rafters, hearing a scurrying noise.

Cisco broke the hug, following Caitlin’s gaze to the ceiling. The noise sounded again, louder this time, followed by a crash and a thud.

Caitlin jogged around the center table to where the noise was coming from. Cisco walked slowly behind her, being cautious of what could come out of there. 

Caitlin saw a pile of trash next to the radiator. She felt a movement from underneath the garbage.

All of a sudden, a rat ran out from underneath the garbage pile and scurried across the cement floor of the lab.

Caitlin shrieked, jumping into Cisco’s arms and burying her face in the crook of his neck. Cisco became unbalanced slightly at the extra weight of his best friend in his arms. 

“Um, Caitlin, is everything alright?” He asked, looking down at her, a slight chuckle coming from his lips. She gazed up at him, lifting her head from its position against his chest. She looked down at the floor, looking for the rodent. 

“There was a rat!” She whispered, pointing weekly at the pile of garbage. He winced at the sudden movement, tightening his grip as to not drop her on the concrete. 

“Ok, and did it scare you?” He quipped, giggling lightly and looking down at her.

“It’s not funny,” She huffed, making a gesture for him to put her down. He complied, placing her feet on the floor, and helping her balance.

“It’s pretty funny,” He rebutted, “you were afraid of a rodent, the size of your shoe I might add.” He finished as she retied her boots.

“You don’t have to be so mean about it,” She chided, brushing her hair out of her face. “It’s a normal human reaction.”

“C’mon, let’s go home.” He smiled, holding his arm out for her to take. She looped her arm through the crook of his elbow as he opened a breach.

_ I can’t believe she’s afraid of rats,  _ He thought as they went through the vortex.

_ That’s my Caitlin,  _ he chuckled as they arrived home. 

_ That’s my home.  _


	11. Day 11: Favorite Affection Touch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the little things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3x10, 4x02, 4x17.
> 
> Couldn't decide, and a special extra one at the end ;)  
> -PZ

Cisco holds out his arm as he watches HR run ahead to the lobby of the building. Caitlin loops her arm through his elbow as they stroll down the hallway, out of the cortex. Barry and Wally’s argumentative voices growing distant as they make their way to the elevator. 

He regards her presence quietly, her humming as he places his right arm on top of her’s. They enter the elevator, his right arm leaving hers to press the lobby button, his left remaining in her right. 

“So, do you think anyone will show up tonight?” She says softly, her voice coming out smooth and gentle. He smiles, chuckling slightly as she turns her head to face him.

“I wouldn’t bet on it,” He replies, turning fully to face her. She does the same, releasing her arm from his hold.

“Very funny, you know this is very important to HR.” Caitlin chides him playfully. He shakes his head, taking her hand in his.

“Well, that doesn’t mean it’ll go well.” Caitlin rolls her eyes as the elevator dings and the doors open.

“C’mon,” She tugs on his arm lightly, leading him out of the elevator. “I have a coffee pot to brew.”

* * *

“It looks like a virus” 

“Well, of course, it’s a computer virus,” He smiles confusedly.

“No, scooch,” She says, hip checking him, his chair rolling toward the West siblings. 

The rest of the day is spent going through his old tech magazines, she looks over his shoulder, pointing to the different pictures in the picture. 

She is so close, he can feel her breath on his lips. His  _ girlfriend _ is on the other side of him, he curses to himself when Gypsy leaves, telling him everything is fine. 

Caitlin says otherwise.

“No, when a girl says she gets it, that means she doesn’t get it at all.” She tells him.

“I’m confused.” He points at his facial expression. She continuously shakes her head, standing up from her stool.

“Don’t be,” She pats his shoulder. “You,  _ my friend,  _ are in so much trouble.” She leaves him with those words, him even more confused than before. 

He brushes it off, focusing on tracking the unknown man in the picture. 

* * *

Caitlin puts her arm on his shoulder, telling him he needs to tell Breacher the truth. He shakes his head, parting his lips to respond.

“Cisky!” Breacher yells, walking gruffly into the speed lab from the back entrance. Both scientists jump slightly, turning their heads toward the older man. 

After a multitude of tests, Cisco hands Breacher a bottle of Caitlin’s Antihistamines, knowing she’ll make him replace them later. 

Breacher thanks him, leaving the room slowly, Caitlin scoffs, telling him he’s only making it worse.

She’s right. He  _ knows  _ she’s right. She’s normally right.

* * *

Caitlin wakes up early to Cisco’s quiet snoring, his hair messily hanging over his eyes. She brushes the back of her hand lightly against his cheek, waking him up slowly.

He looks around the room, strewn clothes on the floor, smudged lipstick on his neck. He looks over at the woman lying next to him. She smiles, lifting herself up slightly to rest on her elbow. 

“Good morning Cisco,” She says, leaning across the bed, kissing him slowly. He breaks the kiss momentarily.

“Good Morning  _ Mrs. Ramon.”  _ He replies, feeling her smile against his lips. 

“I can’t believe-”

“That we  _ finally  _ did it?” He asks, lifting an eyebrow and smirking at his  _ wife.  _

“Yes, but also,” She smiles, kissing him again. “Also that I’m here, with  _ you.”  _

“Me too, mi esposa,” He says, holding out his arm for her to take, “Let’s go get some breakfast.” He tells her. She puts her arm on his shoulder, leaning her head against him.

“I’d love that.” She says looking around their suite. “But first, let’s put on some clothes.” He looks down at themselves, and then back up at his wife.

“Or we could finish what we started,” He leans back in for a kiss, she reciprocates, giggling against him.

She had married  _ Cisco Ramon. _

And she wouldn’t have it any other way. 


	12. Day 12: Favorite Gazing Into Each Other's Eyes Moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3x14, "Your game is so strong!"  
> -PZ

“Maybe my game just ain’t strong,” He admits, taking another bit of his heart-shaped doughnut. She shakes her head in disapproval, a smile growing across her features.

“You’re game is so strong!” She retorts, the silence lingering a few moments after she concludes.

He acknowledges her praise fondly, nodding as she goes on about past loves and future ones. 

They walk in time, growing closer to the exit to the speed lab when all of a sudden Cisco is blasted across the room. Caitlin turns around, seeing the other woman land on the other side of the breach. 

Caitlin runs over to him, asking him every possible question that was warranted.

_ Are you okay? _

_ Do you need help? _

_ What hurts? _

_ It’s okay. _

_ I’m here, I’m with you. _

_ Tell me what hurts. _

Barry knocks Gypsy out and runs her to the pipeline. Iris, adrenaline coursing through her veins, runs after him in her 4-inch heels, self-determination leading her way.

Cisco put’s a hand on his head, rubbing at a bump he feels on the back of his skull.

“Hey, let it be. That could make it worse.” She tells him, gently pulling his hand from his hair and clasping it in her own.

“It hurts.” He replies, reaching the other hand up, her lightly smacking it away before he can reach the bruise. 

“That’s what pain killers are for.” She smiles, “Come on, let’s go get you some.” 

He nods, accepting her help to stand up. They walk slowly down the hallway, cautiously so he doesn’t collapse. He braces himself at the bright fluorescent lights of the Med bay. Sitting on the bed, easing himself onto it, he squints his eyes shut reaching out for her.

“Can you dim the lights, please?” He whispers, bringing his legs up to meet his chin. She nods, walking over to the control panel and flicking a switch. She sits on the edge of the bed, kicking off her heels as he lies back. 

Caitlin’s hair blows back as she feels a presence behind her. 

“He’s already out,” Barry observes, sitting down in the chair across from the bed as his girlfriend comes in behind him. Caitlin nods, looking over at her best friend, his snores the only noise in the room.

Iris places her hand on Barry’s shoulder, communicating with her eyes. He looks up at her nodding, he turns to Caitlin and gives her a sympathetic look. Barry and Iris exit the med bay hand in hand. 

Caitlin hops down from the bed, plopping into Barry’s vacant seat, sighing. It’s the second concussion in a matter of months.

Their lives becoming more dangerous as the seasons change.

* * *

“Hey, Dad can I ask you something?” Cisco’s daughter asks him, plopping into the stool at the kitchen island. 

“Of course, Mija, what is it?” He asks, going back to chopping onions. His almost 15-year-old daughter bites on her bottom lip nervously.

“Well, there’s this girl in my Calculus class and,” Maya stutters, looking down at her lap. Cisco looks up at that, knowing where this is going. “And I think I like her.

“That’s great, Mija.” He smiles. Her expression doesn’t waver from looking worried. “So what’s the problem then?”

“I don’t know if I can ask her, I mean I doubt my game is even strong,” Maya admits, hopping off the chair and going to the refrigerator for a glass of water. She adjusts her glasses, taking her hair out of its ponytail. 

“You know, when I first fell in love with your mother, I said the exact same thing,” Cisco tells her, walking over to his daughter.

“You did?”

“I did, and you know what she told me?” He questions. Maya, shaking her head confused. “She told me, ‘there is a beautiful and intelligent woman out there, who is gonna challenge you to be your best version of yourself.’” He recants the memory, placing a hand on his daughter’s shoulder.

“Mom said all that?”

“You bet she did, and look what happened, I married the love of my life.” He smiles, reeling her in for a hug. “So I say, if you think this girl is someone worth it, I say go for it.” 

Maya smiles, nodding slightly. “Thanks, Dad!” She tells him with excitement littered in her tone. She runs off to her room, passing her mother on the way out of the kitchen.

“The love of your life, huh?” Caitlin teases, meeting him halfway into the room. He kisses her tenderly, placing both hands on her waist. 

“Always.” 


	13. Day 13: Favorite Heart Warming Moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3x09. Caitlin makes it snow for Cisco.

“Hey, hey, what are you doing?” Cisco rushes over, glass of Grandma Esther’s eggnog in hand. Caitlin takes off one of the cuffs, placing it on the windowsill. 

“It’s okay, I got this.” Caitlin smiles back at him, turning to the window as a white mist escapes her palm. “We may not be able to have a perfect Christmas, but we can have a white one.” Sh finishes. The rain turns frozen as snowflakes populate the air. He stares in awe as she controls the cold, her hand hovering over the branch of the dogwood tree on the other side of the window.

He places his glass on the dining room table, moving closer to her as the world turns white. He looks up at the sky as snow falls from clouds, the distant melody of a Christmas carol carries through the wind. 

“C’mon, let’s go outside,” He tells her, holding out his hand as she begins to put the cuff back on her wrist. She takes his hand, tugging it gently as she leads him to the backdoor of the Wests’ house. 

The patio is almost completely covered in snow. He sits down on the top step, helping her sit down as well as she straightens out her dress. The cold not bothering her as much as it would a year ago. He lifts up his arm, wrapping it around her should, pulling her into his embrace.

“I know we can’t bring back Dante,” Caitlin stutters, her eyes quirking up toward him. “But I thought maybe I could make it a little bit better.”

“It’s perfect,” He smiles, releasing her slightly so he can turn to face her completely. 

“Happy Holidays, Cisco.” Caitlin gives him a watery smile.

“Happy Holidays, Caitlin.” They turn to face the yard, the snow glistens as it continues downward. 

He gives her a little nudge, her leaning her head against his shoulder.

“It’ll be okay,” She tells him. “We have each other.” 

_And they always will._


	14. Day 14: Favorite Hurt/Comfort Moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A storyline that was mentioned in 3x10. Caitlin sleeps on Cisco's couch after Dante dies.

A sob broke through the apartment, Waking Caitlin from sleep. She sat up quickly from her position on the couch. Looking into the darkness of the living room, the only light coming from the clock on the cable box. Her blanket had fallen to the floor, cold returning to her legs as she shivered in the mid-summer breeze that was coming from the open window.

She got up from the couch, making her way toward the source of the noise. The door of his bedroom was cracked, fluorescent light spilling into the hallway. Another sob, followed by hushed, grief-filled whimpers, escaped from inside.

Caitlin knocked gently, opening the door. She saw him, leaning against the headboard, legs pulled up to his chest, tear tracks littering his face. She turned her attention to the blue light, an old VHS tape playing on the television. Caitlin watched the home movie play, a little Cisco and Dante dressed up for Halloween, the timestamp read 1996.

She sat on the bed, pushing herself closer to him, so she could wrap her arms around his form. He leaned into her embrace, weeping against her chest. She placed a gentle palm against his head, kissing his hair as he continued to let out all of his grief.

“I can’t believe, he-” Cisco stuttered, looking up into her eyes. She nodded, tracing calming circles against his back.

“I know,” She soothed. “I know.”

He pushed himself away for a moment, sprawling out his legs, hitting his head against the headboard. He reached for the remote, pointing it at the screen and shutting off the video. He got up from his bed, walking to his dresser and pulling out a book. Caitlin reached over the bedside table, turning on the lamp as the light began to flood the room.

She pushed herself up on her hands, trying to get a better look at what he was holding. His back still turned away from her, he closed the drawer, opening up the book on the top of the dresser. Caitlin watched his hands move, listening to the papers brush together as he flipped the pages. He brusquely stopped on a page, picking up the book and bringing it over to her.

As he grew closer, she could see that it was a family photo album. He dropped it into her lap, she looked down at the photos spread about the pages. Different moments from Cisco’s childhood leaped off the pages and into her eyes. A picture of Dante and Cisco at one of the older Ramon’s’ piano recitals. Another one that must’ve been taken the same night as the home video.

She flipped through the pages, watching as Cisco in the book began to grow out his hair. Watched as this Cisco stopped wearing his glasses full time and switched over to contacts. She skimmed the pages, running her fingers over photos, seeing as camera quality increased as the years went by.

The final page held a single picture of Dante and Cisco. Dante held his arm over Cisco’s shoulder, both holding beers and smiling brightly at the camera. Cisco looked younger here, she assumed it was before Barry, before Ronnie, before STAR labs, before metahumans, before _Team Flash. Before her._

He looked happy, his hair falling right below his chin. She looked at him, closing the book and resting it on the bed. He had sat down beside her, looking over her shoulder as she flipped through the book.

“I know how it feels, Cisco.” She began, “To lose someone you love.” At that he froze, looking up at her. His eyes were bloodshot from tears, there were bags under his eyes. She pulled him back into her embrace, him resting his head into the crook of her neck.

“I don’t have all the answers,” She told him quietly, almost inaudible for him to hear. “But we’ll get through this.”

_Together._


	15. Day 15: Favorite Angst Moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2x11 Missing scene. Cisco almost gets erased from existence.

Cisco!” Caitlin shouted as he tinkered with a gadget in his lab. 

“What, Cait?” He asked, not looking up from his work. “I’m fine.” He answered before she had the chance to retort.

“Fainting and almost getting erased from existence?” She continued, walking further into the room. “Yeah, I’m sure you’re  _ fine.”  _ She scoffed.

He put down the screwdriver, turning in the swivel chair to face her. He reached out for her palm, clasping it in his own. She looked down at the gesture, feeling a slight pull on her wrist. He led her to the chair next to him, easing her into the seat. 

“Here, drink this.” He encouraged, handing her the water bottle that was previously resting on his desk. She flipped open the cap, tipping it back slightly as she took a sip.

“I’m here, alright.” She nodded as he continued to rub her back. She leaned into him, disregarding the armrests that resided in between their chairs. 

“I know,” She confided, “But I thought I was going to lose you too.”

_ Ronnie,  _ he thought. 

“Shh, I’m still here.” He told her, spinning her chair to face him. She looked up, bringing the pad of her thumb to her cheek to wipe away the few tears that trickled down. 

“So why don’t we go get Big Belly Burger, maybe a movie?” He asked as she nodded. He took her hand leading her out of his lab as they made their way to the elevator.

_ She had thought she was going to lose him too. _

_ She had thought he was gone. _

_ She almost didn’t have a chance to say goodbye.  _


	16. Day 16: Favorite Action Packed Moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Crisis on Earth-X. Supergirl 3x08, LoT 3x08.

Cisco watched as lightning filled the church, as women ripped the skirts of their dresses. Watched distinguished guests run for their lives. He looked at the woman next to him, eyeing her attire and contemplating if she’d be able to stay in control for long enough. 

“I think it’s time you introduced these guys to your mean roommate.” He told her, taking off his jacket and placing it on the floor. Caitlin looked up at him and then back at the ground, focusing on the cold. Her eyes turned crystalline and her chestnut locks faded white. 

“Where does she get these outfits?” Killer Frost asked rhetorically, looking down at the light pink Bridesmaid’s dress she was wearing. She looked to Cisco, then stood up from her crouched position and shot and Ice Blast to the other side of the church. 

Cisco watched in awe, almost forgetting about the do-or-die situation at hand. He put himself back into high gear. 

“That’s what I’m talking about!” Mick shouted gruffly, standing up himself as he pulled the trigger on the heat gun. Cisco rolled his eyes, ignoring him. 

Cisco watched as his best friend’s alter-ego formed her arm into a sword of ice a slashed through a barrel of soldiers. 

The Kryptonian crashed through the window of the church. Wooden fragments shooted through the air, one hitting him in the air.

She watched him collapse, headfirst against the carpet. 

The archer and his wife left with their army in a cloud of smoke. As the band of heroes watched them exit, she ran to him, bending down to examine him more closely. She hypothesized a concussion, most likely remaining unconscious for the rest of the day. 

They needed him awake.  _ She  _ needed him awake.

* * *

A man’s voice echoed throughout the pipeline. One Cisco could only recognize as Nate Heywood. 

Nate brought each cell to the pipeline to the forefront. Cisco saw her then. 

She ran to him, embracing him openly and wholeheartedly. He rested his head against her hair, her burrowing her face in his neck. 

The Legends and the rest of Team Arrow gave them space, running off to join the rest of the heroes in the speed lab. 

* * *

Caitlin and Cisco dragged themselves into her apartment after the funeral, collapsing against the couch. 

“Nothing like fighting evil versions of your friends to get you in the wedding spirit,” Cisco stated sarcastically. Caitlin stayed silent, looking out at the blank space she called her living room. “Cait?” Cisco asked, looking from the water spot on the ceiling to look at his friend. She rolled her head to the side, regarding him solemnly. 

He sat up, looking down at her as he noticed the tears forming in her eyes. He tugged on her arm slightly, nudging her to sit up. She obliged, letting herself fall against him once she was up from her position on the couch.

“He was my last connection to  _ Ronnie. _ ” She whimpered into his chest, as he quietened her sobs. 

They stayed that way for the rest of the night. Drowning in each other’s grief until they both slowly fell asleep. 


	17. Day 17: Favorite Underrated Moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2x06 Enter Zoom.

Cisco put his arm on Caitlin’s soldier and stuck out his hand to block her from zoom. Barry hung from the other speedster’s demonic claws, seconds away from his last breath.

Cisco looked up at Caitlin’s face, there was pain in her eyes, she was on the brink of tears. Zoom drove his finger into Barry’s side, vibrating it until Barry’s face went white. 

The speedster dropped The Flash onto the floor of the cortex, crying out in agony as a tranquilizer dart flew into his stomach. 

Zoom looked up and saw the man behind the weapon. Cisco still held the speedster at gunpoint, watching as the demonic figure before he convulsed and his breath hitched. The otherworldly metahuman collapsed against the empty mannequin that normally held The Flash suit. 

Cisco pulled the trigger a second time, the dart flying at the man on the floor. 

The Flash looked up as his best friend finished off the final blow. Caitlin ran to the hero, checking over his injuries as he passed out against the concrete floor of the cortex. 

“Cisco put the gun down!” Caitlin shouted, looking over her shoulder and giving him a pleading look. He lowered the rifle, placing it on the work desk beside him. “Get Harry and help put  _ him  _ in the pipeline and then meet me in the Medbay. I’ll need all the help I can get.” She looked down at Barry, and then back up at Cisco. He nodded, running off to find where Harry had gone.

Caitlin put her arms underneath of Barry’s shoulders, practically dragging against the room as she struggled to get her patient from the Cortex to the med bay.

* * *

Cisco came into the room carrying a plate that smelled eerily familiar to her. She looked up from her Medical Journal, noticing the second plate he was carrying.

“Are those my pizza pockets?” She inquired, cocking an eyebrow at him playfully. He scoffed handing her one of the plates, her taking it gratefully. She took a bite, humming as she gave him a pleased look. He having had put them in the microwave for the perfect amount of time, just the way she liked it. 

“How’s he doing?” Cisco asked, gesturing to his other best friend on the gurney. Caitlin sighed, resting her plate on her lap.

“Not much better since this morning.” She stated solemnly.

The Flash had remained unconscious for the past 36 hours, with no sign of waking up soon. Caitlin looked up from twiddling her fingers, gazing across the room at the conscious man before her.

“What happened out there?”

“What do you mean?” He questioned in between bites.

“I have never seen such a look of utter disgust, it was the most loathsome expression I’ve ever seen cross your face.” She told him, putting her plate on the cart beside the bed. He looked up, dropping the pizza pocket from his hand.

“He almost murdered Barry!” He raised his voice, her averting her eyes from his watchful gaze.

“I know, believe me, I know!” Caitlin responded, eyeing the speedster on the bed. “But this was different, it was as if you wanted to…”

“Cait, no I wasn’t going to, it was the heat of the moment.” He lowered his tone, almost inaudible by the time the sentence escaped his lips. She nodded, taking another bite. 

“I know. Of course, I know but you could have-”

“I didn’t!”

“You could have!” She stammered, teeth clenched. “We almost lost someone else, and I didn’t want to lose you  _ too! _ ”

“Hey, no don’t even say that, okay?” He shushed her, reaching across the space to clasp her hand in his own. “Barry is gonna be just fine, and I’m right here, alright?”

She nodded, reaching up with her other hand to wipe the tears that were starting to cascade down her cheek. 

“Go downstairs and rest, I’ll monitor him for the next few hours.” He told her, pulling her up to a standing position. She reeled him into her embrace, soaking in his warmth as he wrapped his arms around her torso.

"I’m right here.” He whispered into her hair. “Everything is gonna be okay.” 

* * *

_ Their lives were filled with heartbreak. _

_ Their lives were filled with horrible people, betrayal, and sorrow. _

_ But it was also filled with beauty. _

_ Their lives were filled with encouraging and wholehearted friendships. _

_ Their lives were filled with happiness and joy. _

_ But it was enough. _

_ He was enough. _

_ Or at least, he was enough for her.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was kind of a fix-it fic because I hate zoom with a passion. But the part where Cisco kind of put his arm in front of her to protect her is a really underrated moment, in my opinion. And I love this episode a lot.  
> -PZ


	18. Day 18: Favorite Jealousy Moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 6x14 The Death of the Speedforce.

“I’m trying to stop Turtle 2 here!” He scoffs, walking across his workshop looking for his hex key screwdriver.

“Yeah, I know.” She says flatly, “It’s _all_ you’ve been doing. You don’t have any time for _me_ , you totally blew off Nash when he asked for your help.” She points out, staring him directly in the eyes.

“I mean,” Her breath catches in her throat. “You might as well still be on your trip!” She stammers, her eyes beginning to water. 

He starts telling her what’s going on, how his trip didn’t go as planned, and how he felt lost, in this ‘Brave New World.’

She pushes her other feelings aside, choosing to help him instead. 

He hands her the tablet, telling her he should go and talk with Nash. 

She watches him leave his workshop, tapping the side of the doorframe on the way out. She looks down at the data he had collected at the crime scene and starts hypothesizing possibilities for their latest meta.

She had missed him, she’d always miss him when he was gone for long periods of time.

But this time was different.

* * *

Caitlin unlocks her apartment door, carrying in her bag of Chinese takeout, unzipping her boots and placing them neatly by the coat hanger.

“What did you mean earlier?” A familiar voice breaks the silence of the room. Caitlin jumps slightly, almost dropping the bags.

"Cisco!" Caitlin raises her voice. "What are you doing here?" She questions a little bit more quietly. 

"I was in the neighborhood and I thought you would be home." He admits quietly. 

"But I wasn't." He nods, giving her a pleading look that says. _I know but you're here now okay?_

She nods, wiping her forehead self consciously. 

Cisco walks closer to her, resting his hand on her forearm. She flinches slightly under his touch, his confused expression wavering to hurt.

“What? It’s just me.” He states calmly, lightly taking his hand away from her arm. She sighs, placing the takeout bags on the floor.

“I know, it’s just, never minds.” She says quietly, hanging her coat on her coat rack and walking over to the couch. He gives her a confused look but brushes it off quickly. 

She plops down against the cushions, looking up at him as he continued to stare.

“So going back to my first question,” He begins, sitting down next to her and moving her chin to face him. “What did you mean earlier?”

“What do you mean?” 

“When you said,” He pauses, looking at the floor. “When you said I didn’t have enough time for you.”

She looks up immediately. She feels her cheeks growing red as he meets her gaze. 

“I-” She stutters, dropping her hand in her lap as he reached out for her arm.

“Caitlin.” Cisco pressures. She averts her gaze, releasing her hand from his hold. 

“I’m allowed to _miss you,_ Cisco.” She rolls her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“But you didn’t just _miss me,_ didn’t you?” He questions as she gulps.

“I didn’t-”

“You’re in love with me.” He states plainly. Her jaw clenches, all the tension in her body comes to the forefront. The sudden pounding in her head leaves her speechless as he continues to stare into her eyes.

Her mouth goes dry, unable to answer him. He stands up from the couch, walking toward her front door. “I’m guessing seeing me with someone else didn’t help much?” Caitlin nods, walking over to him and putting her arm on his shoulder.

“I need time,” She tells him. “Time to think.” He doesn’t respond, inching away from her, reaching for the doorknob.

“I get it.” He states quietly, she stares at him confused. “Believe me, I’ve felt that way,”

“Before.” He finishes. 

“Cisco wait-” He’s out of her door as quickly as he entered, leaving her behind with nothing but her thoughts.

_He’s felt that way before._

_About her._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is most likely a part 1 that will be completed in a later oneshot.


End file.
